Conflict as an Event

To some bosses, conflict is a dirty word – something to be avoided at all costs. I’ve developed a different view of conflict and its purpose, and it’s all thanks to the first boss I ever had.

When I was a young lad I worked as a stock boy at the local grocery store. Tom was the store manager. Over time, he grew to depend on me to get a vast array of things done in a timely manner. I loved the responsibility and really enjoyed having Tom as a boss. Having taken on so much responsibility, I decided one day that a raise was in order. I marched into Tom’s office and asked for one. Things got heated during our discussion and he eventually gave me a very firm no. As I went to leave, Tom could tell that I was angry and upset with him. He proceeded to tell me something I still remember to this day. He said…

“Dan, I liked you yesterday, last week, and last month. And though we may not like each other very much right now, I’m still going to like you tomorrow and I hope that you’ll do the same.”

Tom understood the importance of allowing conflict (the event) to happen in order to prevent conflict (the state-of-being) from living on. We talked, we argued, and it was done. No passive aggressiveness, no “I’ll look into it”. A healthy discussion with a healthy attitude. It increased my respect for Tom and made me feel even more comfortable working with him after that.

I take this view of conflict into a lot of things we do here at BitMethod – design reviews are a great example. We put everything on the table and let the best opinions rise to the top. When it comes time for a client to see the work, team BitMethod is on the same page. I didn’t get the raise, and I still thought I deserved it, but Tom’s handling of the situation kept me from being in constant conflict with him.

About the author: Dan is constantly pushing to make interactive products simple and easy to use. He won't stop digging until he finds that sweet spot where design, development and message come together to create an amazing experience for the user.

Reach out to Daniel Shipton at dan@bitmethod.com